Holy Family 29
December 2013 Deacon John McMullen
The
book of Sirach calls families to tenderness
and compassion: “Whoever honors his father atones for sins....he who obeys his father brings comfort to his mother.... Children, take care of your parents… even if their minds fail, be considerate, for kindness to a father or mother will not be
forgotten.”
Saint Paul takes up the topic of family
life as well. These verses of scripture are often abused. "Wives, be
subordinate to your husbands, as is proper in
the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and avoid
any bitterness toward them." The husband is to be Christ-like
to his wife. That is, being a man of heartfelt compassion,
kindness, humility, gentleness, patience, love, and peace.
In the ancient world, marriage wasn't based on love. So by
calling on husbands to love their wives to the point of death must have turned
the male chauvinism and misogyny of the ancient Roman world topsy-turvy.
Paul also writes: “Children, obey your
parents…. And parents, do not provoke your children, else they may become
discouraged.”
Actually, these
passages are rather radical because the women in the Roman Empire had no say…
and children were property! So for the women and children to be considered
persons is quite revolutionary.
In family life, it’s all about mutual
respect and love. In many ways it is what makes our families our home.
Marriage and family life isn’t about
power or dominating another person; it’s about surrendering to one another for
the good of all.
Christ
calls us to tenderness. And this is certainly the rule for family life.
And
as a result we can become a community of love for one another and for the
world.
Unfortunately, there is much confusion about
married love today. We see it all too
often: someone is in love with being in love and then rushes into a
relationship just be in a relationship. Others only plan a wedding – and fail
to prepare for a life-long marriage commitment.
Too many folks are out are there
looking for someone to come along and fix him or “complete” her; looking for Ms.
or Mr. Right to fulfill his or her every desire, but no human person can do
that. Until each of us seeks to become the right person each of us are called
to be, then we will not likely be right for anyone else.
We
are all aware that the members of our family today have many faces: the youth;
the single person; the separated and divorced; the estranged; the single parent, often a
single mother raising a child or children alone or with help from her parents; the
divorced and remarried with blended families; the widowed; the elderly; and,
yes, the addict and the incarcerated. Yet all are
called to live as the family of God, loving and caring for all.
But let’s admit it, the Holy family did not have it easy either.
Joseph
nearly divorced Mary. And Mary could have been stoned to death for her
questionable pregnancy. Then the expectant couple had to travel 90 miles to
Bethlehem for the Roman census and taxes. Where Jesus was born in a manger, in the
shadows of a world
dominated by Roman tyranny.
The first
Christmas itself was marred with tragedy.
In the gospel King Herod
felt his whole world threatened by an infant!
So he ordered
the slaughter of all the baby boys in Bethlehem – two years and under.
Saint
Joseph is told by the angel of the Lord to protect his family, to flee Judea
and go down to Egypt; he is obedient to the Word of God. Joseph teaches us by
his silent witness that he is a man for others, willing to lay down his life
for Mary and Jesus when he does as the angel instructed.
Yet each of us is
called to protect our families and each other. Joseph’s example calls us to
support the lives of others and protect others from evil and death. You and I are
responsible for the care of each other.
There
are many threats to family life today: alcohol, drugs, and violence, murder. (On
Christmas Eve there was a murder and stabbing not far from here off of
Washington Avenue).
There is a malignant spiritual
force that seeks to destroy our lives, our souls, our families. There is certainly
something diabolical in our current culture that has become so blatantly
anti-life, anti-child, and anti-family.
We see marriages that are nothing more
than a prom date gone wrong; and may last a day to a week, Christian marriage itself
being redefined by society, reduced to mere emotional sentiment; purity
ridiculed, human sexuality cheapened and debased; while others
regard pregnancy as a disease or the
gift of human life is treated as one more consumer good, a product that one has
a right to purchase, manipulate, or destroy at whim.
For the children that are born, human personhood
is now considered by a few something that should be earned, and only granted to
those human beings that are desirable or meet certain physiological or cultural
standards.
Yes,
I hear the concerns, the anxiety, the discouragement from many of you: “It’s
hard to believe what is happening in our world; sometimes it’s very difficult
believe, to be hopeful in the face of such evil.” “How did we ever get so far
away from kindness, tenderness, and love?’”
Yes, our culture has
grown cold, cruel and violent, but there is hope! We are called to be the
warmth of God, a light in the darkness, a tender loving presence in the midst
of evil.
We have hope. Christ
entered into our sinful world to redeem us! And this is our hope, the very same
hope of the holy family.
The Sacrament of Matrimony is
the foundation for the Christian family; the place where children first learn
the love of God through the love of their parents. The family is the domestic church, “the Church at home,” where
children first witness the faith proclaimed and lived as a community of grace
and love, learning the art of forgiveness. Children also learn the dignity of work, participating in family chores and responsibilities, helping to make the house a home.
Parents
are the children’s first teachers in the faith. Families should gather for
family prayer and worship regularly at the parish. Children should especially
see their parents praying and; helping those in need, serving others, and
forgiving each other. Often. Often.
The
family that eats together stays together. How appropriate that the kitchen
table is sometimes called the altar of
the domestic church. For every home is a church and, just as we gather here at this altar to share in
the feast of the love of God, when we gather around our kitchen tables, we find
consolation and nourishment and prayer.
A
family that eats together and prays together will then share their faith with
others. As a result true joy will be a radiant light in the darkness, the
tender loving presence of God mercifully
welcoming all.
This is what it means
to be a holy family.
Together,
then, let us grow as holy families,
and
as holy families we will become a holy Church,
a welcoming
parish family and home for all.
Intercessions: Holy Family Sunday
That the example of the holy family may
inspire the Church of God and all of the baptized to imitate the virtues of
family life and extend us in acts of charity, we pray to the Lord…
For an increase in charity for those
called to the vocation of marriage: may their love for each other and their
openness to children, be a sign of Christ’s love for the Church, we pray to the
Lord…
For children everywhere, especially
those who are neglected and abused: that Christ in His mercy may free them from
evil and distress, and that their abusive parents or guardians may have a
change of heart, we pray to the Lord….
That Christ may guide the minds and
hearts of all those who govern us: may they promote the common good, especially
safeguarding the lives of families, children and the elderly, according to his
will, we pray to the Lord….
For all of our parents, especially those
who are ill or suffering mentally, emotionally, or physically; and all those
who have no one left to comfort them, may we patiently and tenderly love them,
we pray to the Lord….
That all of us might open our doors to
those who have no family or those who are estranged from their families of
origin, as Jesus taught us, we pray to the Lord….
For the lives of the unborn and newborn:
that all might see the dignity of human life in Jesus the infant child, we pray
to the Lord….
That the souls of our dearly beloved
dead, especially _______: may the souls of the faithful departed, through the
mercy of God, rejoice in the presence of Christ, we pray to the Lord…..
It has been said the family is the unit of society. Society seems determined to re-define the family without realizing it is re-defining itself in a destructive manner. To quote Fr. L. Giussani: "In the family it is evident that the fundamental element in development of the person lies in the mutual, conjugated belonging of two factors: man and woman." To me this implies fatherhood -- the protector and provider, like Joseph and motherhood -- the nurturer of mind, body, and soul, like Mary.
ReplyDeleteLet us pray for marriages that they mirror Christ's love for his Church and thus promote a culture of commitment as we support in a loving way those families struggling with divorce, separation , single parents, illness, and poverty.